Don't Piss On the Urinal Cakes

This morning I woke up on time for class. Made two fried eggs and some toast and downed approximately 24 oz. water and a hot green tea (another 10 oz.). Well, about an hour later I'm sitting in class and my bladder is screaming, but I couldn't leave because I was on-call today to answer the prof's Socratic b/s (for those that are interested the case was New Jersey v. T.L.O., 469 U.S. 325; a must-read for any would-be highschool drug dealers).

Anyway, I had to answer the firing squad questions all while I was about to piss my pants.

As soon as class was over, I b-lined it to the loo and had one of those "chipping porcelain" type of urinations. Well, I wasn't concerned enough with accuracy and started to hit the urinal cake. This refracted an un-Godly amount of piddle back in my direction and hit my pants leg. Funny thing was, I had just told my g/f and my friend that, "I had to pee so bad, I'm about to wet myself."

Luckily, no one was in there yet and so I just went into a stall and dried my leg off with some toilet paper. But let that be a lesson to all ye would-be Brett Favres of bladder-dumping. Don't just bomb it out there all willy-nilly with your willy. You must use accuracy and caution even under exigent circumstances.